Monday, December 29, 2008

Holiday Honey Do List

By: Joseph Norman

Trouble figuring out what to do with yourself this holiday season? Does free time from your day job leave you in front of the television, puzzled about what to do next? Well, here's your Holiday Honey Do List to end your year right!

Forget working out, play Wii Fit. Who needs to fulfill that New Year's Resolution with an actual membership to the gym? The average person pays about $100 per month for a gym membership and only goes once every two weeks! Buy yourself a Nintendo Wii and save yourself the guilt.

Join Facebook. College students waste all kinds of time on social networking sites like Facebook. Why can't everyday working professionals as well?

Park your car in a snow bank. I tried this one about a week and a half ago. It gave me at least 36 hours of pure enjoyment. Please note, this may result in unexpected nature hikes back to your apartment, inability to use some of your extremities for a short period of time (i.e. your hands), and the opportunity to use heavy construction equipment to dig your automobile out.

Return unwanted gifts. You know you want to. Just chalk it up, be honest, and ask for the receipt. The money will probably be more useful to you anyway. Worst case, re-gift it or sell it on Craig's List!

Movie marathons. Rocky, Rambo, and The Lord of the Rings Trilogy are personal favorites. Take a few days, forget showering, and watch movies until your eyes go bloodshot or you can't stand your own stink anymore. It's as fantastic as it sounds. Don't take my word for it, try it yourself!

Travel to a foreign country. Ben just left for Chile for a week and a half. Ever thought about leaving America behind and taking the next plane to Japan? Some advise planning an excursion like this, I recommend spontaneity. Japan too scary? How about Mexico or Canada?

Organize a Nude Resolution 5k. Why are so many people against streaking? Is it a legal thing? Even more of a reason to organize an all nude 5k! Mix it up and give the people a little something different to get excited about. Feeling philanthropic? Donate the proceeds!

Build a snow fort. Upon completing your movie marathon, you may want to try to build a replica of a structure in the Battle of Helms Deep from Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers or an Afghan village from Rambo 3.

Put on your Sunday best, than go to McDonalds. Enjoy some sophisticated banter with the staff about the seasonal Egg Nog shake, savor the flavor of an Oreo McFlurry, or pick something up off the value menu.

Don't take yourself too seriously. Sprinkling in an occasional slice of ridiculousness into your life is just as important as closing that next deal. Smile big, laugh hard, and enjoy yourself!

May you and yours have a fantastic start to the New Year!